Over the last couple of weeks I have had to deal with some difficult decisions. I have had to listen to how people felt about others. Honestly, it was disheartening, but it felt like they were talking to me. I do not mean the person I am today, but who I was 20 years ago. Listening to them made me realize I was once this same person they were telling me about. I felt awful afterwards.
No one had ever told me these things they were saying, but I know I had done them. I had to learn and reflect on my own to become better and not be that person. Over the years I have worked on my treatment of others and improving myself. Part of me wishes I had that conversation, maybe I could have grown faster! Over the years I have learned and applied these principals and rules. Here they are.
Helpfulness. Always do more than you are paid to do. Your compensation is a direct function of your contribution. We too often take for granted the people around us. When someone walks in to your business what do we do? When we walk into a place of business what do people do? Most times people just do not see you or we just do not pay attention. We have become immune to them. Being helpful is customer service, whether it is people we work with or new clients. Commit to be the most helpful person you know.
Understanding. Speak less and listen more. Stop what you are doing and look at them, not your phones or computers. Make them feel as if the world has stopped. This makes them feel they are being lifted up in a world that is tearing them down. Our ego usually gets in the way, by "screaming so loudly", that we have no ears to hear what others are saying. We want people to think we are the smartest by talking the loudest and most. We wait for them to finish talking to speak the reply we have been rehearsing. Speak less and listen more!
Mingle. Be out there connecting with team members and customers. People love doing business with people they like. Do not hide in your office or behind emails. Be out there with them, have coffee with them. Be there with them in good times and bad times.
Amuse. Have fun. It helps increase energy and boost productivity. Team member relationships build because of the increased engagement.
Nurture. Be awesomely nice. Being kind is not a weakness. Balance compassion with being courageous, being friendly with being firm, being sincere with being strong. Put people and relationships first. Be tender and tough. See people as they are but see them for what they can be. This is the act of bold leaders. As you sow, so shall you reap.
This acronym helps me to keep these principles in focus. I am not always great at them. I can say when I have intentional focus on them they do work. Being a leader is not about having a title. The deeper your relationships the stronger your leadership. Leadership is influence. Nothing more, nothing less. The best way to have influence is through relationships.
Now back to the situation that influenced this writing. I am proud to say, they have reflected on the things that was said. They have worked on themselves over the last few weeks and positive feedback has been voiced by their peers. We see them as they are but we also see them for what they can be. In conclusion, just be HUMAN!
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